My name is Smriti, a female and all this happened to me long time back, but truly speaking I remember everything as it has happened yesterday. This is about my first sexual encounter with my neighboring Uncle, and his name was or you can say his name is Dev. I knew him since one normal child start recognizing people.
We were living on first floor which was a top floor of that type of construction and he was residing on the ground floor. Before getting to the sexual incident with him I would like to give brief of those circumstances in which I grew and finally landed into this. Everything which I am mentioning about past is all said by my mom to me as I was just a kid at that time.
My mom says that we also had a good income and money long time back as my father had a business and my mom was looking after the house as a housewife. I really don’t remember that dreadful moment of crashing of stock market in 1992, because I was too young to understand that accident. But that crash took everything from my father.
Basically my father was running a travel agency and along with that he had huge investment in stock market. With that collide my father faced heavy loses and he got bound to sell everything including his office and most of my mom’s jewelry. Fortunately we had a shelter to live and now my parents had to start it allover again.
My mom did that, she joined one school as a history teacher, she was professionally qualified for that, but my father never revived from that and got involved in drinking, smoking and few other types of narcotics. Gradually I grew up in somewhat financial struggle and by the time I reached in high school, I was big enough to understand everything.
My mother was working and my dad was just spending. He was not bothered about my school fee or even for the basic food we needed. We had a terrace on top of our house so somehow my mom managed to make a small portion on that and which we rented out for extra income, but finally we were unable to protect that money from my father and for that most of the time
my parents use to fight and countless times I saw my mother getting beaten up by my father. I was in High School and now I was suppose to appear in boards, and as expected from the circumstances I was struggling in studies too. For that Asha aunty came in front, she use to live on the ground floor, as we were living on first floor.
Everybody living around our house was well aware of our problem and Asha aunty was through with our living conditions as she was the only friend of my mom and my mom use to share everything with her. Dev Uncle Asha aunt’s husband was civil engineer and he use to remain at home, though he use to go out everyday on work but by noon he use to come back.
Sometimes I have seen him talking to my dad, he was trying to make my dad understand that whatever he is doing is wrong, and more over I remember once he appeared with Asha aunty when my father was beating my mom and me after consuming large amount of alcohol and he saved us by locking my dad in the toilet.
Anyway my mom talked to her about my studies and Asha aunt asked Dev uncle in front of us that if he can teach me, Dev uncle agreed without thinking twice. My free tuitions started and Dev uncle taught me every subject, including Hindi and social studies which were not at all his subjects.
Uncle really worked hard by reading my textbooks till late and prepared me and finally I appeared in boards and cleared with nearly sixty percent aggregate. Life moved like that, somehow my mom use to protect her salary from my father by keeping it with Asha aunty, but we never got rent of that terrace flat and it use to feed my father’s bad habits.
I chose humanities for +2 and somehow continued my studies and in those living conditions I prepared myself to work secretly and for that once again Dev uncle helped me, through his reference I got job of teaching 3-4 children of 2nd to 3rd standard. I had to get there homework done from them in the evening in 2 hours.
Though now we both were working me and my mom, even then we were struggling as life in a NCR can never be cheap, so some how I cleared my 12th and started my graduation. As far as my friend circle was concerned, I never had any best friend since my school time, my females classmates never came closer to me after knowing truth of my life,
though they had sympathy for me but they were never my friend and opposite to that few rich guys tried to attract me through their money and rich gestures but I avoided them as I had lot of things to think about. And as far as sex was concerned, like other females of the same age I use to sedate my sexual urge using conventional way,
with a help of my finger while fantasizing few of my male class mates and couple of young teachers and truly speaking at that time this act was playing vital role as a stress reliever of my life’s anxiety. I was still working like I was in the past and my income was bit more now but now secret of my income was also revealed to my father, and we were struggling to protect our money from him,
we were just moving with the life, me and my mom never got successful in saving much. And whatever we saved secretly it went into my father’s treatment whenever he collapsed and needed hospitalization. Time moved and by now we were habitual of our problems. I remember it was end of my first year when mom’s best friend Asha aunty passed away because of fatal road accident on the Jaipur highway.
Dev uncle too got seriously injured and remained in hospital for a long time. Mainly I and my mom attainted him in the hospital for few days till Dev uncle’s son arrived from united states and finally after some more time we all started reviving from that sorrow. His son flew back to states as he was working there and he tried to take his father along, but Dev uncle never gave a thought to that.
My mom had savings with Asha aunty which Dev Uncle knew, but he did not knew that how much is saved. Dev uncle trusted my mother’s words and never reflected any disbelieve even for a fraction of second on that matter and many times when my mom use to take her money from him for any purpose he formally asked for any sort of other help.
When Asha aunty was alive my mom use to rely on her a lot, for us she was sort of mental security that if we will fall in any sort of emergency then Asha Aunty will help us and after her sudden demise, in the beginning mom use to get depress but Dev Uncle’s behavior bought us that security again, though uncle was very reserved and we never had any long conversations with him,
and as such I was in very less contact with him after my tuitions, and mostly it was limited to formal Namestay and from my mom’s side too it was very limited, and mostly my mom use to go into his house in the beginning of the month, just to give him her spare money. We never spoke to uncle a lot, even then now we had physiological support from his side, just because his gesture use to give us reflection that he cares for us.
As such life was moving when suddenly something happened to take our life into more trouble. My mom faced a neuro attack, and she collapsed like a castle of cards on the floor on one dreadful evening. At that time my dad was not home, neither we knew that where he was at that time, neither we knew that whether he will come in the night or not,
I was alone in the house with my mom and I just rushed to Dev uncle leaving my mom on the kitchen floor. He immediately came up with me and lifted my mom in his arms and came out and screamed for help in the neighborhood and with some help we rushed to the hospital. I was in utter shock and could not stop crying.
Mom got admitted in the ICU and uncle instructed me that I do not have to move from there. He went back to the home and managed money, he deposited initial amount and treatment started. That night uncle stayed with me outside the ICU and remained there till next afternoon. By that time my father was also there and uncle instructed him that he has to stay here till we will be back.
Uncle took me along and after getting fresh we had something to eat on the way and came back to hospital. Through out the way I wanted to ask him that how much amount he has deposited in the hospital and how much we had with him, as I didn’t knew that how much my mom has saved, but I could not utter a word.
I was really very scared, neither he spoke anything in that context, rather he just spoke once or twice when I was crying a bit, just to give me mental support that he has talked to Doctors, and everything is in control, there is nothing to worry about. We came back to hospital and remained there till night. I and Dev uncle, we both were tired, and wanted to sleep.
As such everything was in control and my mom was in observation and nobody could enter in the observation room, so logically there was no reason to stay there, even then Uncle gave instructions on the help counter of that floor that in case of any emergency, they have to contact him. So finally leaving my father there once again we came back.
He bought dinner from the way and we had at his house and finally I entered in my house to sleep. In morning I got up early and I was expecting that uncle will also be ready, but he was still sleeping when I rang his bell. I was expecting that he will come to hospital with me, but he was not in condition, he was somewhat more tired.
After informing him, that I am going to hospital as I turned, uncle stopped me and called me inside and gave me 20k with one hand written slip, and told me to deposit this cash on the counter. At that time somehow I managed to ask him that how much we had with him and how much he had paid yesterday.
Uncle smiled a bit and caressed my cheek lightly and said, “You do not have to worry about that, tum usski tension matt lo”. I came to the hospital and deposited the cash and remained in the hospital. At around mid day Uncle came with packed lunch, we were still outside observation room, one more day passed like that and now soon my mom was suppose to shift into the ward.
That night finally I slept in the private room with my mom, uncle chose good neat and clean room. In next one day my mom recovered and asked me that how much is spent as money was the main concern of our life. Finally from uncle we came to knew that it was three times the amount we had with Uncle which was already spent and we were still in the hospital.
This fact bought lot of tensions in our mind and couple of times me and my mom cried when we were alone in the hospital room. Dev uncle uses to come everyday in the afternoon, as he use to go to his work in the morning, and many times my mom thanked him for his help. Me and my dad were staying in hospital alternate days and couple of more days passed like
that and I remember that day my dad was suppose to stay there and uncle came there very late in the evening and after spending an hour or so he asked me if I want to come along with him to the house. I agreed and once again he bought food from outside and we landed in the house.
We had dinner and as such we were not talking much, and mentally I was much occupied because of the money we borrowed from him. After noticing me for some time uncle asked me that what I am thinking, I spoke the truth that I am worried about the money which we have to return, and with that I started crying. Once again he said, “You do not have to worry about that”.
Finally after dinner I moved up, to my house and tried to sleep, but I could not, I was so tensed that I could not think about anything else except money. After spending some time with my courseware in the night, I came out in the balcony, as there was no sign of sleep in me. I remember time was around 11. I saw Dev uncle standing near his gate at the end of veranda looking outside.
Don’t know what he was doing, I could see just his back. I moved down to meet him in curiosity and he heard my voice and turned to see me. He was holding a glass in his hand with something in it. He was consuming alcohol and as Uncle realized that I am here he tried to hide the glass but by that time it was too late.
Keeping his glass on the wall he softly asked me that why I am awake at this hour, for which I said that I don’t know why I cannot sleep. He just said go and watch something on television, I will come after some time. I went inside his house and switched on the television and intentionally sat at the place from where I could see him and as expected Uncle picked up his
glass and continued having his drink and after around 15 minutes came inside the living room and settled down on the other couch and spoke in bit of disappointment, “Smriti you must be thinking that I am a bad guy”, I could not answer I just kept on staring him and said no after some time by just moving my head. He spoke again, “I cannot sleep without having at least 3-4 pegs”.
I gathered some courage and said, “but uncle this is not good”, “I know but I can’t handle this life anymore”. Then after few seconds he spoke again, “you are big enough to understand this, …………..it is very difficult to live alone”, “but this will harm your body”, “I know, but this body is a root of all problems”.
At that time I was unable to understand that exactly what he has said, though it was clear that he is feeling lonely in the absence of his wife, after some time I came back to my place and tried to sleep but I was repeating his lines again in my mind and suddenly it stroked me that what he meant by “this body is root of all problems”, he was talking about his sexual desire,
about his need of physical love. And after that I got more uncomfortable and could not sleep for the whole night. Next day I stayed at hospital and gave a thought to his problem, and you can say that it was my childishness that I thought about surrendering myself to him physically, just to pay back for whatever he has done for us.
It was a mere thought of a girl, of just 20 and you can say I was immature, but truly speaking at that time it was a big issue for me, I was thinking about everything he and Asha aunty has done for us, Asha aunty has given every kind of support to my mom, mental and financial. I remember whenever she use to go for shopping, it was for sure that she will bought something for me too,
some times t-shirt or jeans or any other latest trendy cloth and sometimes something to eat which is either expensive or rare which we cannot afford, and she use to do this just to keep me away from any kind of inferiority complex or starving feelings for such things. How could I forget those tuitions which I got from Dev Uncle, he was the one who made me clear my boards with reasonable grades,
my small job of teaching small kids which I got from his reference and above that he was the one who saved my mother’s life from lethal neuro attack, it was new birth for my mom and as I was depending on her so for me too. Matter was too complicated for me to handle and I was unable to think anything else except this.
I gave a thought about surrendering myself to him physically again and again and remained half minded till the end and if suppose I would have taken decision that I have to surrender, even then I did not had courage to ask him that if he wants to have sex with me then I am ready. So for the whole day and once again whole night I was occupied, I was thinking about having sex with Dev Uncle,
and suddenly I realized that just that feeling, I mean thinking about getting intimate with him pleasured me a lot and my body started releasing pleasure juices and truly speaking that itself was very relaxing. Next day I met him in the hospital when he came with the food, which he bought for me and my father.
Though he was casual and talked to me and my mom, like he use to in the past, but suddenly I realized that my perspective to look at him has changed a lot. Apart from respect and admiration now I was having bit of his desire, desire of being close to him physically. I think whoever has passed from that age can understand this mental state.
In this age it is very easy to fall for anybody and generally one gets confused in his or her ideal and love. I was falling in love with Dev Uncle, and these thoughts were driving me, and I was following my dream and desire of getting intimate with him without thinking about future of this. I came back home in the evening independently, Uncle was already home, and I met him,
not just because I was suppose to, I wanted to see him and intentionally I asked him if he wants to have tea, he said ok to it and I made the tea and we had it together. After spending some time with him I got up to go, Uncle somewhat ordered me that I have to come at dinner time and today he is going to order Pizza.
For me it was very easy to spend time with his thoughts and finally I came down to his house by 9 for dinner and he ordered Pizza. We watched TV while having it. I sat there even after dinner; movie which was getting telecasted was interesting and I wanted to see it till the end and more then that I wanted to stay there, with him.
I asked him casually that if I can see this movie till end and uncle casually said, “yes…. Yes why not, just feel like home” for next hour we sat together and saw that movie. Time was again around 11 when he got up from there and went inside the bedroom and did not turn back in the living room.
After some time I got up and tried to find him, door of bedroom was open and I saw him, uncle was sitting on bed resting his back on the wall, he was reading something while having a drink. He noticed me and again kept his glass aside and asked me, “is it over”? I said, “No, its almost in the middle,” I further asked, “…… I hope I am not disturbing you”.
“no…. no… please carry on, main bhi aata hoon” he replied casually. After around 10 minutes he came and sat opposite to me and after 15 more minutes spoke to me somewhat asking me, “ Smriti, you know it very well now,……… I hope you don’t mind if I will have it here only, while watching TV”. I could not speak any word, and just moved my head in acceptance to say yes.
Uncle got up and came back with a glass and retained his position. He was focused on television but I was very conscious and again and again I was looking at him and he was noticing me that I am uneasy and finally after few minutes he spoke, “I think you are not comfortable”, I gathered some courage and spoke “I want to say something”,
and at that particular time I was really very scared, my heart was beating very high, and I knew that I will not be able to speak up what I wanted to say. Uncle kept his glass on the side table and asked me, “what”? “Uncle please, stop having this, it’s really very bad thing”. Though I wanted to say something else, but I could not gather courage and in last moment I changed my statement”.
“For me it’s necessary, it helps me to avoid getting into depression of being alone, and I take it in very limited quantity so don’t worry”. I was just looking at him, actually I was trying to gather some more courage to speak what I wanted to but I could not, I tried but nothing came out of my mouth and once again uncle read my expressions, and asked me again, “bolo you want to say something”?
I moved my head in yes and spoke with a high heart beat “uncle kya main aapka akelapan door kar sakti hoon”. Uncle looked at me without a flick of an eye for few seconds and then focused on the television. It was one of the scariest moments of my life. He did not responded to my question and we kept on watching movie.
After some time, around 10-15 minutes I got up to go and spoke with my eyes and by moving my head that I am going and he responded in the same fashion and got up to lock the door. Once again I slept very late that night and thought about this relation a lot and gradually I was getting confident about my decision of getting involved physically with Dev Uncle,
now I was not that confused that I have to do it or not and from my side I was ready, though I was bit scared but the sensation which I was feeling in my body while dreaming about that moment of intimacy was much more powerful then the fear and that night finally I slept after satisfying myself with a conventional way of masturbating while dreaming about having sex with Dev Uncle.